8 Steps to Long-Lasting Relationships
How do couples stay together for much longer
than a decade? What's the secret to their longevity?
Stony Brook University psychologist K Daniel O'Leary
and his research team set out to answer these questions, and the results were surprising.
The study was done on couples who have been together for at least 10 years, and
looked into what kept them married and in love for so long. The couples were asked
behaviour-based questions so as to reduce bias. The findings, published on the social
and personality journal Social Psychological and Personality Science, revealed these
main factors:
- Thinking positively about
your partner
By constantly thinking about the things that make your
partner awesome, you won't be irritated by the negatives.
- Thinking about your partner
when apart
Not every second, of course. But he/she should at least
cross your mind at some point.
- Difficulty concentrating
on other things when thinking about your partner
It means your partner takes up a lot of your brain
space, which is a good thing!
- Enjoying novel and challenging
activities
Taking on challenges with your spouse can improve your
love for him/her.
- Spending time together
This strengthens your emotional bonds with each other.
- Expressing affection
Let him/her know, in one way or another, that you love
him/her.
- Feeling generally happy
Emotional distress has been known to cause relationship
issues, so try to stay happy.
- Having a strong passion
for life
People who are enthusiastic about living their lives
are known to carry that zeal into their relationships.
This article was first published on DUET magazine.